Talk Nerdy to Me
by savvydaun05
Summary: Eggsy (Taron Egerton) and Lucie (Jesy Nelson) go undercover as "nerds" at a Halloween party. While Lucie is trying to keep her mind focused on the mission, Eggsy can't help but be a distraction and a bit distracted himself. (EggsyxOC) (I apologize for the repeated summary at the end!)


**HI EVERYONE! GUESS WHO?! Now, before I go on, I just want to say a couple of things. First off, thank you to all who are reading this and to those who have faithfully followed me at every turn. Second, I am truly sorry for not keeping up with my writing. I've just been so busy with so many other things. But I am getting better! And so, here I am with all new stories for all new fandoms! Let's start with my latest (and possibly strongest) obsession: KINGSMAN!**

 ***Lucie Wilkes, my OC, is portrayed by Jesy Nelson (for some reason I can see her acting out this role)**

 ****Aaron Neillman, another OC, is portrayed by James Frain (frankly I am LOVING what he is doing on Gotham)**

 *****I do not own Kingsman or any of the characters... nor do I own Shakespeare and his sonnets.**

 ******I apologize in advance for anyone that is OOC or becomes OOC later on.**

"Galahad..." Lucie began in a strict tone, trying not to let the fact that Eggsy's hand sliding down her back and towards her ass was turning her on slightly. After all, they _were_ on a mission.

* * *

It was rather last minute, the mission. Merlin got word that one of Kingsman's main targets, multi-talented doctor and potential terrorist Aaron Neillman, was going to be present at a high-class Halloween party. Initially Lucie was the only one who got assigned to go undercover and plant a small tracking device on Neillman so that Merlin could keep a positive and definite record of him. However, Eggsy managed to talk his way into the mission for the purpose of "serving as back-up if things go south". Lucie couldn't help but smirk upon hearing that. While she knew that it was a logical excuse, it was only part of the reason he wanted to go. The other part included him spending more time with his girlfriend.

Yes, _girlfriend._

Lucie Wilkes and Eggsy Unwin were an item.

Guinevere and Galahad were dating.

Who would've guessed?

* * *

One of the "perks" of being a couple is that for occasions such as Halloween you got to wear those cheesy couple's costumes, which is exactly what they did. After a few minutes of debating and searching through Kingsman's extensive wardrobe, the two agents decided on dressing up as "nerds".

"You almost done?" Eggsy called out while examining himself in the mirror. He totally looked like a walking stereotype. A particularly _hot_ walking stereotype. He was giving his hair a final run-through when he finally saw Lucie walk out of the dressing room. What he saw in the mirror nearly killed him and he had to turn around and see if he was hallucinating.

But Lucie was no hallucination. She was a nerd with a really short plaid skirt, a really low-cut top, and her hair up in a really sexy style.

"Uh..." was all Eggsy could manage before Lucie looked at the floor, blushing and saying, "What?"

It took Eggsy a moment to regain himself and straighten back up. Once he did, he said, "You look good."

"Really?" she asked, daring to look up at him. Eggsy couldn't help but chuckle a little at her actions. She was probably one of the toughest agents he knew, next to Roxy. But there were times when she always let slip her insecurities, particularly about her looks. It was moments like that that she truly let her guard down and Eggsy loved it. It's one of the many reasons he loved her.

With a grin, he walked over to her, laid a gentle hand on her cheek, and said, "Really."

Lucie's face lit up at his response, and it only got brighter when Eggsy's smile widened. As a reward for his compliment, she leaned forward and kissed him passionately. He kissed her back, slipping both of his arms around her waist. It lasted for a good minute before Lucie pulled back, nearly breathless.

"We have to go," she said.

"Do we really?" Eggsy whined.

"Yes," Lucie replied, trying to slip out of Eggsy's hold but having no such luck. "Eggsy! This is our only chance to get this guy. We have to make it count."

"Okay. Okay," he grumbled, finally letting her go and starting to make his way to the door. However, he felt his suspenders being pulled from behind and stopped, giving Lucie the chance to stand directly over his shoulder and whisper into his ear, "If your good, we can pick this up after the party."

Eggsy closed his eyes while letting out a small moan. So many different scenarios ran through his head. He could feel Lucie smirking into his neck and placing a chaste kiss there. "Deal?" she asked, her warmth slowly leaving. He turned so that he was looking her directly in the eyes. Those deep, dark eyes that he could not possibly refuse.

"Deal," he finally said, making Lucie smile with approval.

"Good," she simply stated, walking toward the door with a little extra swish in her hips.

Eggsy chuckled. Only she would have the nerve to tempt him after making an offer like that. Little did she know that he was planning a few little tricks of his own for the night...

* * *

His first trick was pulled almost five minutes after first arriving at the party.

It was supposed to be a _Halloween_ party. But, by the look of things (at least in Eggsy and Lucie's eyes), it was really just a casual costume party. To them, Halloween parties included over-the-top decorations, creepy yet delicious food dishes, and of course people dressed up every which way, from half-assed and cheesy to detailed and scary as hell.

This party, this _Halloween_ party had none of that.

What did it have?

Over-priced trinkets and mementos scattered in every room. Little snacks and treats that were hard to pronounce. Many important, rich people dressed up in stupid party hats, ridiculous beads, and modest costumes that showed absolutely no skin.

One could only imagine the number of eyebrows raised and gasps elicited when the two agents stepped through the front door of the mansion. Lucie almost felt like abandoning the mission and waving down the car to come back and take her home. But Eggsy quickly grabbed a hold of her hand and confidently led her to the ballroom, the main focus of the party. All the while, people kept staring and muttering under their breaths. Lucie and Eggsy could only stare back as they searched for Neillman.

It didn't take them long to find him. In fact, dressed in an elegant tux with two glasses of champagne in hand and a charming smile on his face, _he_ found _them_.

"Hello!" he warmly greeted, handing them the glasses. "Welcome to the party!"

"Thank you," Eggsy spoke first, accepting the champagne and shaking his hand. "I'm Harold Winterson."

"A pleasure," Neillman replied. Without hesitation, he turned his attention to Lucie. "And who is this lovely young schoolgirl?" he asked, giving her a thorough once over. Luckily he was too busy to notice Eggsy's jaw tighten slightly at the remark.

"Ariel Mackenzie," Lucie spoke shyly, acting out a slight blush. She was rewarded with a rather long kiss on the hand by Neillman. "I hope we're not.. overdressed," Lucie piped up, snapping Neillman out of his trance. He took a look around at the other guests and chuckled. "I know it seems a bit lame. This actually wasn't planned by me. If it were up to me, I would have a skeleton in every closet."

"And a eyeball in every punch bowl?" Eggsy added, making them all laugh.

"I like how you think!" Neillman exclaimed. He was soon interrupted by one of the butlers whispering into his ear. With some slight annoyance, he dismissed him and gave the couple an apologetic look. "I'm sorry to have to cut this short, but I must discuss something with one of my colleagues. I hope you enjoy the party." With that, he disappeared into the crowd.

"Arsehole," Eggsy said under his breath before taking a sip of his drink. Lucie punched his shoulder lightly. "Well, he is!" Eggsy retorted. "Flirting with my girlfriend right in front of me."

"He doesn't know that I'm your girlfriend," Lucie argued back, following Neillman as closely as she could from where she was. "Besides, Merlin made us promise not to play the 'boyfriend and girlfriend' card. Remember?" Eggsy did actually remember. In fact, he could distinctly remember Merlin's annoyed expression and tone when he was first discussing Eggsy tagging along.

"I don't even want to think about that right now. Honestly, I don't want to be here right now. I'd rather be back home. Under the covers. Watching horror movies. The lights out. You laying right next to me. Holding on to me tight." As he said this, he snaked his arms around Lucie and pulled her in close so that his breath tickled the inside of her ear. She already knew what he was trying to do and ripped her gaze away from Neillman for just a second to straighten him out.

"Nuh uh uh," she scolded, pushing Eggsy away gently and giving him a stern look. "Remember our deal?"

"But..." he started. "No." she interrupted, not letting up. "You be on your best behavior, okay?" She didn't wait for a reply. She simply turned around to refocus on where Neillman stood, deep in conversation with an older gentleman.

Eggsy could only raise an eyebrow at her small performance. "Well...it seems that the student has become the teacher."

"Okay..." Lucie started, clearly more engrossed in the plan that was slowly forming in her mind than her boyfriend's words. "All I have to do is wait until he's alone. Hopefully, the music will change so the people can start dancing. I can go over, talk to him, convince him to dance, then plant the device on him." With that, she subtly felt the tracking device that she hid in her pocket-protector. It was like a patch, strong enough to keep tabs on all of Neillman's whereabouts but light enough to where he would never feel it.

She quickly noticed that the older gentleman was slowly departing with Neillman, who was making his way to the bar. Now was as good a chance as any.

"There he goes," she whispered to Eggsy, not bothering to look at the seductive expression he had plainly on his face. "I'm going to follow him. You try to keep as close as you can to me, okay?"

"What's three divided by three?" he asked suddenly. Lucie whipped her head back around to him. "What?"

"I asked what three divided by three was," he repeated, inching his way closer to her face.

"Galahad..." she warned, remembering to use his Kingsman name.

"Please, Ms. Mackenzie," he pouted, "I've forgotten what three divided by three is and I really need it to pass a test later." Lucie sighed heavily. She knew that Eggsy was not going to give up with whatever he was up to so she complied with, "One. The answer, _Mr. Winterson,_ is one."

"Oh! Right!" Eggsy exclaimed with mock surprise. "One. As in you are the only 'one' I want to be with right now."

"Exactly," Lucie tried, hoping that Eggsy would be satisfied and let her go. However, him being cheeky him, he had a few more words for her. "As in I'm the only 'one' who gets to flirt with you. As in there's more than 'one' way I'm going to have you when we get back home."

"Galahad, please!" Lucie begged, looking at him with a pleading look. "Later."

"Promise?" he asked.

"Promise."

"Later?"

"Later."

"Our own private tutoring session?"

"Yes!" she finally exclaimed, breaking free from Eggsy's hold and preparing herself to approach Neillman. Before she could take her first step, she jumped with shock as she felt Eggsy gently slap her ass. She looked back to see his smug expression. "Go teach him a lesson, Ms. Mackenzie."

She gave him a final glare before walking over to the bar. After a second or two, she found herself breaking out a small smile. Yes, her boyfriend's antics could be annoying at times, but really she wouldn't trade them for anything in the world. Remembering herself, she wiped away her expression and sat herself about two feet away from Neillman. It was only a matter of time before he noticed her and casually slid in next to her.

"Having a good time?" he asked.

"Not until they play some actual music that I can dance to," she replied, sipping her champagne and looking around at all of the people standing and making small talk with others.

"I'd imagine you'd want to dance with your boyfriend."

She turned and gave him a convincing, confused look. "Harold is not my boyfriend."

"Oh," Neillman stated, a bit shocked with a hint of relief. "I just assumed that..."

"It's okay," Lucie interrupted. "It happens a lot. No. As much as I like him, he's just... not my type."

"Really?" he asked while leaning in closer to her. "Well then, Ms. Mackenzie, what _is_ your type?"

It took every ounce of strength within Lucie not to remember Eggsy using that exact same name with her.

"Well, Mr. Neillman," she leaned along with him, "I like a smart man. An talented man. A more... experienced man."

He smiled at her and she returned in kind. Suddenly, the dull music changed to the song "Monster Mash." Lucie's eyes widened with amazement.

"Oh my God!" she squealed with glee. "This one of my favorite songs!"

"Really?" Neillman asked, raising an amused eyebrow.

"Yes! You want to dance with me?"

"Oh, I don't know," he modestly said.

"Please?" Lucie asked, pouting a little with a glint in her eyes. As if by magic, Neillman nodded. She smiled wide and placed her glass on the counter. She was just about to take Neillman's extended hand when all at once a tall, nerdy form intercepted them.

"Hey guys!" Eggsy said a little too enthusiastically. Lucie's mouth gaped open in shock. _What the hell is he doing?!_ she wondered wildly. "Have you seen the architecture in this place? Amazing!"

A little surprised at the sudden interruption, Neillman quickly recovered and adapted. "Uh... yes. I know. Most of it is taken from early Russia."

"Fascinating, huh, Ariel?" Eggsy asked, turning to her so only she could see the mischief in his eyes.

"It sure is, Harold," she remarked, faking her best smile.

"Mr. Neillman," they were interrupted again by another butler. He whispered urgently into Neillman's ear and waited for him to follow suit. With a heavy sigh, he laid his glass down and straightened himself out. "I am terribly sorry to keep leaving you two like this, but there appears to have been an accident outside the main gate."

"Oh dear!" Lucie gasped in shock.

"Don't worry, my dear. I'm sure it's nothing. I will be back shortly."

"Just in time for the next dance?" Lucie asked.

"Of course," Neillman smiled, giving her a small wink before heading for the front door.

Once he was far enough from hearing distance, Lucie snapped, "What the hell are you doing?"

"What?" Eggsy asked casually, downing what was left of his drink.

"You know what! I had him and you let him get away!"

"Calm down now! He said he was coming back. You'll get your chance."

With a small huff, Lucie, too, drank the last of her champagne.

"Oh, come on," Eggsy scoffed. "You can't be that upset with me."

"Well I am," she replied coldly.

For a while, the two sat in silence. Finally, Eggsy spoke up. "You thinking about putting me in detention?"

"No," she said, not wanting to look at the suggestive face that she knew would have her melting at first sight.

"Why not? I deserve it. I deserve to be punished." He leaned in close, resting his head on her shoulder and looking up at her longingly.

"I will punish you," she stated, looking nowhere but ahead, "by not rewarding you after the party."

"What?!" Eggsy snapped his head up in horror. Lucie smiled inside. She had caught him.

"You heard me."

"Oh, please!" Eggsy whined, dropping desperately on his knees and clutching at Lucie's legs. She jumped at the sudden movement and looked down at Eggsy, who continued to beg at her feet. "Please, Ms. Mackenzie! Please! I'll do anything you say if you promise to keep the deal! Please give me another chance! What if... What if I did something? A make-up assignment? For extra credit!"

A tad bit embarrassed by his outburst, Lucie looked around and hoped to God that no one was looking at them. Fortunately they were too busy with themselves and Neillman had not come back yet. She still had some time. God, Eggsy was really getting into the whole "teacher/student" thing. On the one hand, Lucie _was_ really upset that Eggsy let slip her opportunity to plant the device on Neillman and get them home early, so she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of giving in to him. On the other hand, she had to admit that the little game they were playing was... fun. Especially in such dull surroundings.

"Please Ms. Mackenzie," he pleaded, giving her such puppy dog eyes.

Genuinely intrigued by his offer, she slowly turned her gaze down on him. "Such as...?" she asked.

Eggsy's whole face lit up as he sprung to his feet. "Really? You'll let me do it?"

"Yes."

"YES!" he exclaimed a little too loudly, not caring if he was getting some unusual stares from some of the other guests.

"But..." Lucie started, making sure to give her teasing boyfriend her most stern look as a "teacher", "it isn't going to be easy."

Eggsy's demeanor faltered a bit at this, and Lucie couldn't help but smirk at her small gain. However, it was short-lived as Eggsy got an idea.

"What if I recited something? Like... Like Shakespeare?! He's hard as shit!"

Lucie gasped.

"I mean, I mean, 'Shakespeare is hard'. Sorry Ms. Mackenzie. Can I try?"

For effect, Lucie took a minute to think it over. "Okay, Mr. Winterson. What are you going to recite?"

"Shakespeare's rare but beautiful Sonnet 130," he replied, straightening his posture.

"Very well," Lucie said, taking a seat on the stool with her legs and arms crossed accordingly. She watched as Eggsy made his way in front of her and cleared his throat, ready to give his speech.

And he did not disappoint.

"My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun;

Coral is far more red than her lips' red;

If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;

If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head."

He spoke so clearly and loudly for her, never taking his eyes off of her for a second. She could only stare back and gape in amazement. Eggsy always had that effect over her. Just when she thought that she was used to all of his tricks and charms, he would do something that would blow her away. She could almost feel herself about to cry at the thought. But, she quickly and inconspicuously regained her senses and continued with her "part" as Eggsy continued with his speech.

"I have seen roses damask'd, red and white,

But no such roses see I in her cheeks;

And in some perfumes is there more delight

Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.

I love to hear her speak, yet well I know

That music hath a far more pleasing sound;

I grant I never saw a goddess go;

My mistress, when she walks, treads on the ground:

And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare

As any she belied with false compare."

Before she knew it, he was directly in front of her with his hands on either side of her stool to lock her in place. They remained that way for a while, looking at each other, not moving a muscle. Eggsy finally felt the need to speak up.

"So... how did I do?"

Lucie would have loved nothing more than to _show_ him how good he did. _But,_ they still had a job to do. Plus, she did _not_ want to lose to him. She dared herself to edge off of the stool and move Eggsy backwards a little. She stared so long and hard into his eyes that he failed to notice her hand slowly raising and grabbing a gentle hold of his jaw. Inching herself closer to his face, she whispered, "I am giving you one last chance, Mr. Winterson. If you continue with your antics, I will take disciplinary action."

Eggsy swallowed hard at her words. She smirked again, a little wider than the last time with a bright gleam in her eye. _Damn..._ was all that Eggsy could think of. Or, maybe he accidentally said it because it was Lucie's fit of giggles that snapped him back to reality. And just when he thought he couldn't get any more embarrassed, Lucie leaned forward and kissed his cheek (which he was pretty certain had turned a nice shade of pink).

"Good boy," she said, looking away just in time to see Neillman heading their way.

"Okay," she whispered, subtly prepping herself and Eggsy for what was to come, "He's coming back. Just be sure to keep me in sight. If I can pull this off, we will be out of here in five minutes. Tops."

"Great," he replied, forgetting who and where he was and surging forward to give his love a kiss. Luckily, Lucie caught him before he was an inch away and scooted him in the other direction. She had just enough time to compose herself before coming face-to-face with Neillman.

"My apologies, Ms. Mackenzie," he said rather sincerely.

"It's okay. Is everything alright?"

"Oh yes! Quite fine. Just a guest who had one too many drinks. We got him a cab. He should be fine."

"Good," Lucie sighed with relief.

"Now..." he said, extending his hand out elegantly, "I do believe I promised the lovely young schoolgirl a dance."

Lucie came up with a convincing blush as she took his hand and said, "That you did."

Neillman flashed a grand smile and lead the way. Taking the opportunity of him not looking, she inconspicuously took the tracking device out and placed it in the palm of her hand. _This is it!_ she thought excitedly. _No turning back._

They made it to the center of the room, just in time for the song "I Put a Spell on You". Without missing a beat, she placed her palmed hand on his neck, close enough to meet his skin but not enough to make it look awkward. Holding her other hand and placing a soft grip a little too far down her waist, Neillman began swaying to the rhythm of the song. Lucie took care to hold the device in place to make sure it stuck properly. Every now and then she would look over Neillman's shoulder in search of Eggsy. Her eyes finally met his across the room. He was leaning against the wall, a new glass of champagne in his hand, hawk eyes fixed on her and her dance partner. If it wasn't for their deal, she was absolutely certain that he would have swept her away, taken her to one of the private rooms in the mansion, and _devour_ her. Just the thought of it made her bite her lip.

Unaware that he was watching her, Neillman shifted his gaze to where she was looking and said, "Is something wrong?"

 _Damn!_ Lucie mentally slapped herself for getting caught in a moment of weakness.

"Oh no!" she exclaimed in a hurry. "I... just can't help but worry about my friend. I know I said that there's nothing going on but... still..."

"I understand completely darling," he interrupted with a sympathetic look. "I honestly don't blame you. True friends are hard to come by."

"Exactly."

"It's good to have someone who knows you. Who will always be there for you, through good and bad."

Lucie didn't pay any attention to the look in Neillman's eyes. All she did was focus on Eggsy, who still stared at her but with a much softer gaze than before.

Although she hated to admit it, Neillman was right.

She was so lucky to have Eggsy. They had been through so much together, and not just with Kingsman but with _everything_. She loved him for better or for worse, and he loved her the same way. And she could not help but smile a rare true smile before taking one last look at Eggsy and saying, "Yes it is."

With that, the song ended and the small audience applauded the DJ, who announced a short break.

"Thank you for the dance."

"Anytime," Neillman smiled approvingly, which soon turned into disdain when a squealing voice shouted from across the room, "AARON, DEAR!"

Lucie jumped in shock at the noise and turned to see a red-headed woman in a Medieval dress strut across the room to meet Neillman. She practically pushed Lucie aside and forced her hand up to Neillman's face. "Long time, no see!" she cheered with delight.

"Margo," Neillman said, trying his best to hide any discomfort and slowly kissing the lady's hand. "It has been a long time."

"Oh, you must come and talk with me and Terrance. He's been dying to speak with you!"

"Of course, of course." He quickly shot Lucie another apologetic look, to which she nodded her understanding.

"I hope you don't mind me stealing him from you, dear," Margo finally turned to address Lucie, grabbing a hold of Neillman's arm that practically stated that she was not letting him go even if Lucie wanted her to.

"Not at all," Lucie responded politely. "He's all yours!"

"Peachy!" she said, dragging Neillman away while talking a million miles a minute. If he wasn't a potential terrorist, Lucie would have felt sorry for him.

"Finally," she did not hear Eggsy say as he sneakily made his way up to her and held her in place.

"Galahad!" she hissed under her breath at the contact.

"What?" he asked, coolly. "You got the tracker on him. Mission accomplished! Now, we can celebrate. I just called Merlin. He said the car should be here in a few minutes...plenty of time..."

"Galahad..." Lucie began in a strict tone, trying not to let the fact that Eggsy's hand sliding down her back and towards her ass was turning her on slightly. After all, they _were_ on a mission... _Were_ on a mission... That she completed... Successfully completed... So... maybe it wasn't so bad if she...

 _No!_ she screamed internally. _Do not give up now!_

With confidence, she straightened up and turned to Eggsy, leaving him slightly confused. "I promised you that we would celebrate _after_ the mission. We're not done yet. Not until we get back home and clear everything with Merlin."

Eggsy groaned and rolled his eyes with despair. "Seriously?!"

"Seriously, _Mr. Winterson,"_ Lucie emphasized his alias. She grinned at the blank expression he gave her.

* * *

The definite conclusion of the mission could not have come more slowly than it did in Eggsy's mind. The car came and pick them up about fifteen minutes after his call. The drive took about an hour. And the debriefing with Merlin and the others took up _another_ hour. When the grand finale finally came, Eggsy grabbed Lucie's hand, guided her to one of the deserted hallways, pushed her up against the wall, and kissed her with all of the passion that had been boiling inside of him all night. Lucie completely threw her "teacher" act out the window and kissed him back in kind, cupping his face with one hand and going through his hair with the other.

After what felt like forever, the two mutually pulled back for air.

"So..." Eggsy said through heated pants, "What's my final grade?"

Lucie threw her head back and laughed. "You're still carrying on with that?" she asked, to which she only got a cheeky grin in response. "In that case... I say... A for effort."

"Yes."

"C for control."

"Oh, come on!"

" _And..._ A plus plus... for just being you."

Eggsy stared deep into Lucie's eyes at that. Boy, he was the luckiest guy in the whole world. Apart from Kingsman and Harry, Lucie was the best thing that had ever happened to him. He was _really_ lucky.

"So... I pass?"

"With flying colors."

Eggsy leaned in to kiss Lucie once again, which she returned with as much fire as the first time. It was short-lived when, suddenly, Eggsy picked up Lucie bridal-style and carried her to the suite that she had set up at Kingsman (fortunately, it was not too far from where they were). With ease, he set her down and unlocked the door. They stood there for a little while, with Lucie playfully picking at his suspenders.

"So... you gonna teach me a lesson?" he finally asked, knowing full well what the answer was going to be and what all was to follow it.

"Yes. I. Am," she replied, punctuating every single word while leading him into the room by the suspenders.

The door shut with a click and their private tutoring session began.

 **I know that Halloween is long gone, but I originally came up with this idea during Halloween and I meant to finish it by then. But... it turned out MUCH LONGER than expected! Be sure to review and keep an eye out for future stories! GOODBYE FOR NOW!**

Eggsy (Taron Egerton) and Lucie (Jesy Nelson) go undercover as "nerds" at a Halloween party. While Lucie is trying to keep her mind focused on the mission, Eggsy can't help but be a distraction and distracted himself.


End file.
